Thursday, May 13, 2010

More confessions....

I have this thing. This belief. This conviction. As a wife, a mom, a woman, an employee, the world expects me to have it together. But I don't think it's the world that puts that expectation on me. I think it's me applying the pressure. I worry that if I don't have it all together, other women will judge me or won't like me. So, we hide our imperfections. And this perpetuates the image that we have it all together.

So here's my thing. Us women ROCK. We rock because of our imperfections. We rock because we are the glue that holds it all together. But sometimes, we aren't perfect. AND THAT IS OK. My thing is we should be open about our imprefections. And then they won't be imperfections anymore. They will simply be normal-ness-es. And maybe there won't be so much mompetition and the Mommy Mafia will need to find new things to attack and judge. I mean seriously, we all have confessions. If you say you don't, we know you are lying.

So here are some things I have to confess, to get off my chest:

* I don't always understand what my kids say. Sometimes I just smile and nod and say, "Later." Also, we prayed so hard for Zach to talk and I don't really want to "shush" him. But after hearing the same thing a hundred times, I kinda lose my patience.

* When other people are playing with my kids and enjoying them, I feel guilty. I feel bad because I don't always enjoy them.

* I am afraid to ask for babysitters because I think my children are so difficult to babysit. Sometimes, I don't even want to "babysit" them.

* When my kids are at Challenger Baseball, I don't care if they spend the entire game in the dug-out or looking for Four-Leaf Clovers in the outfield. Other parents get all worked up if their child isn't up to bat. That doesn't matter to me... I'm just happy they are outside playing.

* I rarely vacuum under my furniture.

* I don't have patience for the children who cry over tiny injuries. And I don't sympathize with the parents that freak out over a little cut. I have a friend who's son is a mild hemophiliac. They should freak out about little things... but they don't. So I don't get the people who do.

* I am counting the minutes until I'm done with my 8th graders. I actually like the kids. I just don't like teaching the kids. If we could just hang out and not do anything academic, it would be fine. The minute I try to impart knowledge or start a discussion... well it goes downhill fast!

* My five year old is not potty trained and I haven't given it a full effort. I've tried, half-heartedly, but until I get my 8 year old fully there, I'm not ready to take on another project.

* My underwear is getting a bit ratty looking, but I'm too cheap to replace it all.

* I gained 1.6 lbs last week. I guess eating non-stop doesn't work when trying to lose weight.

I know there's more to confess, I will just need to gather them for the next week or so... So let's hear your confessions! Leave me a comment!


Kerri Dieffenwierth said...

Hi Kristin. I totally "get" your philosophy and love your blog. Check out my little blog and some thoughts I had on Mother's Day, I agree that people who act or talk like their lives are perfect are lying.
And honestly, now that I'm in my mid-40's, I just don't have time to wear a mask. If I don't have time for makeup, why would I have time to wear a mask for others???

Jennie Sipe said...

Hi Kristin! It's me, Jennie, your long-lost swim buddy from Z-Ville. I don't know if you remember this...but I still remember "Stat in anoma phil." (I'm sure I've butchered the spelling.) All I remember is we were studying Latin derivatives. Every once in a while I'll just start singing "Stop in the Name of Love" in Latin and think of you. We came up with one heck of a mnemonic! LOL Anyway, I've enjoyed reading your blog. As a woman with no children, I can say your thoughts and emotions are not mom-specific. I share your same thoughts and emotions. I think God brings people into your life (Or back into your life) for a reason. Just briefly talking to you and reading your posts on FB, have really brought me joy and reassurance that faith and God are still very much alive. You are such a sweet, intelligent, and positive person. You haven't changed a bit! I'm rambling...I know...I just wanted you to know that you have positively influenced my life and I'm glad to know you! ~Jennie

Paula said...

Kristin, we can be "normal" together, okay?

I don't know what my problem was the other day, but you got me out of it. It was nice being able to "vent" or sort out my feelings with you without fear of being judged. You are a true friend!

Prachar family said...

I am just now reading this blog and enjoyed it immensely. Thanks for keepin it real...honesty and trust baby! My underwear is ratty too. I LONG to replace it home takes priority!