So it's been awhile...

We will just forget that it has been 6 months since I've blogged.  Of course, plenty has happened, but nothing super exciting - unless Ryan acting like a terror, Zach having tons of seizures, and me doing nothing while the boys are in summer school is exciting.

Anyway, Zach has been saying some pretty cute stuff lately and I wanted to record the ones I remember.  This is for my memories and probably won't be that cute for you.

• We won tickets to a baseball game and I'm not allowed to go he told me that Sue can come.
• He wanted an expensive backpack and I wanted him to explain why.  He told me that Brewster ate his backpack.  So I asked why it had to be this particular one and what he needed it for.  He said, "Umm.  Hmmm.  I want to bring my teacher movies in my backpack."
• While at Target, he told me, "Daddy said I'm not allowed to have new shoes.  Daddy says we can only buy backpacks."
• When asked how old he is, he says, "I'm four on Saturday."
• He finds fart noises and burps hilarious. He loves to imitate the burping of happy birthday...
• He calls the Internet motorcycle store "Bike broken store"

I'm sure there is more and I will add to it...

But not to be left out, Ryan is doing a better job of talking.  He's got quite a few mastered including Momma, more, home, phone, done, sound, daddy and Brewster.

Brewster!

I'm happy to announce that Brewster is now a Mikarts!  He is the perfect dog! I have yet to hear him bark, he follows Mark around like a shadow, and he is not a "lick-y" type dog.  He lets Zach use him as a pillow.  He LOVES play catch and lets the boys chase balls with him.  When he goes for a walk... he goes for a walk - the dude does not like to dwaddle!

We are in love and will post pictures soon!

We Want a Dog

Yes, folks, we are crazy.  We want a dog.  Not just any dog, a labrador retriever. And notice that I said "Dog" not "puppy"?  After many months of thought, consideration, and procrastination, Mark and I decided to move ahead with the dog.

It's a lengthy process - submit application, home study, dog selection, meet dog, get approved by foster parent, get dog.  We could just go to the Humane Society and pick out a dog, but we want to be matched to the perfect dog...

The volunteer who does the home study was sick on the day of our initial appointment and we ended up waiting another week.  When she did come, she was super awesome and was great with my kids (a sign that she is top-notch). She told us that it takes a few weeks for the right dog.  I said all the right words about being patient, but my actions this week prove otherwise.

I became obsessed.  I must have emailed Gwen 10,000 times.  I narrowed my desire down to a fat, yellow lab in Ft. Myers named Buddy and a chocolate lab in Ft. Lauderdale named Brewster.  Brewster has a deformed back paw and primarily uses 3 legs.  Many people consider that a deal breaker (including my mean husband.)  For me, it endeared him to me that much more.  But I really, really want a yellow lab.  So I decided that if the deformed paw is not an issue, I shouldn't even consider it in my decision.  I told Gwen that I choose Buddy.

She emailed me the next day... Buddy is already taken.  I'm happy with Brewster and want to load up the car and drive to Ft. Lauderdale and bring that dude home!!  BUT... remember the 3-4 week process?

Yes folks, Gwen is out of town this weekend and so I won't be able to make the Brewster connection for another week.  Bummer. Bummer. Bummer.  I'm also worried that the foster family wants to keep him.  They said that he is the best dog they have ever had!

So I'm telling this story to share an interesting irony...  We want to provide overnight care for a friend's foster son (grandson, really).  But to get the social worker out to our house to approve our home is next to impossible. I find it interesting that the dog people are much more available and much better corresponders than the people in charge of children! Seriously! The social worker can't come later than 3 pm or earlier than 8 am.  Hello... I work from 8:30 - 4:30.  Wouldn't you want people with steady jobs to watch the kids??  So I won't be able to provide care for this sweet boy until the summer - when I'm available for a home visit.  Crazy and not fair to his foster parents - or my boys who play really well when he is around!

Update: We are hopefully going to meet Brewster this afternoon.  He is 3 hours away and Mark isn't completely on board.  He doesn't like the deformed paw or the pointy face - rather than blocky face.  His foster mom called him the best dog she has fostered. He doesn't need a crate, he doesn't need obedience class, he likes to be around people, he seems perfect!

Zach is still a spaz and other tidbits

Zach is still a spaz and we had to tweak his seizure meds, so we can't tweak the ADHD until we know the seizures are under control.  That just makes for long, interesting, and sometimes funny nights. He becomes hard to control and defiant when the ADHD meds aren't working.  It's not horrible, but I have to be on my "parental" game all the time.

Here are some random tidbits of our lives - most of these are Tweets or Facebook statuses.

Tonight I made chocolate chip cookies and Zach thinks they are spooky.  He would rather eat Chips Ahoy with all the transfat possible.  I told him, "You can have an apple after you eat my cookie."  Seriously.  How many of you have had to say that?

I got this note from his teachers, "Zach might need a bath tonight.  He and a classmate were barking like dogs during recess.  I told them they should pretend to be earthworms so they would be quiet.  Zach went over to the grass and played worm."  I love it!!

I lost my keys for 3 days. I searched high and low at work.  I found them during Sunday School.  In my purse. I forgot about the secret pocket...  I wish I could say this was my first time doing something stupid like that.  It's not the first and won't be the last.

We got 10 yards of dirt and I shoveled most of it one Friday afternoon.  It took 2 hours the next day to be finished.  I felt great.  I get a text from Mark on Monday asking if I ordered more dirt.  Apparently, we only got half of the load on Friday...  We didn't have anywhere to put the new dirt!

Ryan has this really cute, "Stop" and "Go" thing he does with his hands.  It's so cute!!!  You need to come see!!

The other day Ryan was being stubborn and I said, "Ryan! You are forgetting who the boss is."  Ryan replies, "Meeeeee..."

Basketball is over and soccer and baseball are starting.  I can't wait to see how soccer goes.  We have a baseball game this Saturday - Brandon and Kane are joining us!  I am excited to see how all the boys play together. If it's like last time, it will be great - the boys play together and don't need me.  Every once in awhile, they will say my name just to make sure I haven't left.  It's so cute!! I just hope Kane doesn't mind that Zach will follow him EVERYWHERE he goes!

Maybe next time I blog I will actually have something to write about!

Alien Invasion

It's happened. The aliens have invaded my oldest son. I knew middle school years would be tough - I have been teaching middle schoolers for 17 years. (Yes, I started teaching at age 11 - I'm gifted like that.) I've always said that I'm not sure how I will survive the middle school years. I can't believe my sweet baby Zach will be a middle schooler next year. (I can't make this paragraph behave)

The alien invasion has been slowly happening. A little 2nd look at a girl here; an additional glance there... A little mood swing here; a little mood swing there. Then on January 16th at around 3 pm it happened. The full blown invasion. I'm not kidding. I know the exact day!

A little kid came over to play and when he left, Zach hasn't been the same. Kane was the UFO that brought the aliens. Defiance. Mood swings. Spastic behavior. I'm not ready for this. Zach isn't even anywhere near puberty but the aliens are here. And I don't know what to do... (And Kane is an adorable, great kid - he's full of energy, but he listens and stops doing what you ask him to not do - so I don't know how he got mixed up with these aliens...)

You see when teaching an alien-possessed boy, you send him home at the end of the day. You talk a good talk with the parents. You smile, you tell them this too shall pass. But you don't really have to live with it. As a parent, it's all different. I find my self frustrated. Yelling. Sending him to his room and then laughing about whatever he did. I'm just praying that God puts the right tool in my box. And here is where * I think * I deserve extra sympathy - Zach can't communicate well and this adds to the mood swings...

For example, yesterday we had complete meltdown because it was my turn to go to the dentist. His turn isn't for 2 weeks. He could not understand why he had to wait and he melted. A complete puddle of sobs. Over the dentist.

I'll keep you updated on adventures with a pre-pubescent alien-infested boy.

I know, how did these cute thing become one of THEM?!

So stinkin' hard

Here I am having a lovely day, enjoying life and thankful for all the blessings I have. Three days until Christmas Break and kids who are uber excited about Christmas. Finally, Zach gets that Christmas is not about Santa, but about Jesus' birthday. I'm feeling pretty good.

Then wham! A phone call that gets me shaking. Literally. I'm not going to elaborate on that phone call, but it's not a good one. And now I'm faced with something I am ill-prepared to deal with. And I don't know what to do or even what questions to ask. I'm stunned. Then, the realization that I need to talk to Mark about this- and that is going to suck. A lot.

I hurry home only to find out that he isn't here yet because of a super-long meeting at work. So four hours after the initial yucky phone call, I still haven't had a chance to talk to Mark. And this is driving me crazy, but is not the point of this post.

But the bottom line is, I find that I need to forgive two people. The one person who did something much worse is easier to forgive. The person who should be easier to forgive is much harder. Why is that? And why is it so stinkin' hard to forgive? I know it's important, I know why I have to, I just don't know HOW. I pray. I ask God but it seems like there should be more to the process. I don't know... like whack myself on the head with a thick Bible or say a certain prayer. So instead I will focus on scripture that addresses forgiveness.

And I will be thankful that it's not hard for God to forgive me. And that prayers of protection work. And that God made us all different and if everyone were like me, the world would be an even bigger train wreck. I am not sure that I will ever like this second person, but I can't let him take up so much space in my brain. Not forgiving him will not make this person nicer, more loving, or less legalistic. Not forgiving will make me equally bad.

Any hints on how to forgive? Now accepting all suggestions...

Ever feel like this?

I think we all have those moments where we wonder what is going on. I'm just lucky enough to have caught it on film... We all (except Zach) have that "Huh?" look!